Behavior Change: Why Is It So Hard?

by | Aug 9, 2017 | Brain Health, Lupus Blog | 0 comments

Hi everyone, I’m Dr. Connie. I hope you are all having a good week so far. I’ve been reflecting on the importance of behavior change and willingness when creating health.

In fact, without willingness, behavior change will never happen.

But what is even more interesting to me is that despite the need to change, often, we find ourselves in a struggle to do the very thing that we all “know” will change the outcome of our situation.

For example, I knew for a long time that altering my behavior to change my diet would change the course of my Lupus.

However, my emotions hijacked this logic, keeping me in a state of helplessness.

I was perpetuating the state of my Lupus flare by not acting, but I just couldn’t explain why I chose not to act sooner.

Now I understand that there’s a scientific reason for this lack of behavior change. I chose to talk about this topic today because I realize that many of my patients struggle with this.

While some patients are willing to do anything to get better, there are others that struggle to make this change. I see that they want to, but they have a hard time doing it.

It’s important to understand that emotions influence our body systems at the cellular level in ways that are either renewing or depleting.

Our attitudes toward our condition or illness will largely dictate how our condition affects us.

It all starts with stress.  The idea of stress is elusive at times because we are always experiencing it daily: sitting in traffic, time constraints, illness, financial struggles, and family issues… is stressful.

But did you know that the perception of stress is what’s more important?  That perception is created by YOU.

Our Perception Influences Our Reality

Our emotions are central to the experience of stress. Feelings of anxiety, irritation, frustration, and helplessness are the “experiences” that we “perceive” to be true at that moment.

Those perceptions and thoughts carry a charge that tend to loop in our conscious awareness, triggering a stress response.

And most toxic effects on our health are the physiological effects of our negative emotions.

What I mean to say is that our habitual emotional patterns, especially negative ones, will define who we are, so much so that we progressively resist changing this very paradigm.

For some of you, it’ll be an “aha” moment, but for many of you, you’ll have a confused look.  And both are ok.

I feel this is the most important information that I can share with you to help you have a different perspective. One that can serve you better.  One that can help you heal.

So much science is involved in this concept, but I won’t bore you with the details.

I wanted to share the basics with you so that you know that your behavior is not necessarily your fault, and once you are aware of this you can take back your control.

The most important thing to remember is that even though we are sick and may be going through a health crisis, like a Lupus flare, we will naturally resist the behavior change that will heal us.

And Einstein said it best. “Insanity is doing something over and over again, expecting different results.”

Treating patients for over 19 years, I’ve learned that most of us resist changing the very thing that will make a positive impact on our lives.

I’m here to guide you out of that crazy loop.  The first step is becoming aware of this.

My gift today is a healing, guided meditation to reframe your perspective and to help you create a renewing mind. Check out today’s blog video that contains the link to the meditation.

If you enjoyed this, please subscribe to my You Tube channel, like my Lupus Rebel Facebook page, and subscribe to my newsletters on I would love your comments below.

Until next time, enjoy!

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