It’s Okay When Things Are Not Okay

by | Jul 9, 2021 | Lupus Blog | 0 comments

Hello, everyone. Welcome to our Mind Your Health Blog. I hope you all had a wonderful month of July, and a wonderful weekend with your families. Today I want to talk to you about how sometimes “It’s okay when things are not okay.”

Looking back, I think about how it’s so much easier for me to fall into the trap of thinking that my health is an entitlement when things were easy and health was an easy pursuit. Until I’m sick and down under from autoimmunity, I forget how hard I have to work to maintain my health.

It’s Okay Not To Feel Okay

I’m no stranger to debilitating pains, weariness, weakness, and all the other symptoms that come with medications, as well as the dread that comes with them. That is a different story. And I recall wondering to myself, “How can I stop feeling this way?”

In order to feel better, we’re continually thinking and looking for answers. And we frequently believe that feeling unpleasant is not the greatest option. That happens all too often in the name of health and wellness. 

When we have autoimmune flares, we get concerned and frustrated because we aren’t feeling well. I’m not good about admitting that I’m feeling bad at the moment and giving myself grace. Instead, I fight against what is causing stress in my life. As a result, this has a detrimental effect on my health and everything else.

Let’s remember what drives our physical health. All the manifestations and symptoms that occur are often bodily symptoms that you and I find bothersome. Let’s also not forget what lies behind the surface of our physical manifestations of imbalances. It’s our mental and emotional wellness that causes and contributes to physical illness. 

Negative Feelings Are Normal

I want you to stop and understand that sometimes when we’re feeling sucky, sick, and down and under, it’s okay to take a long, deep breath and just be in the present moment with what is. Because life is full of ups and downs. We believe that the more we can avoid having undesirable feelings, particularly negative ones, the faster we will be able to cut to the chase and do whatever it takes to reduce the amount of time that we are unhappy.

But the negative feelings are an essential part of the human experience. They are just as important as the positive feelings we experience.

More importantly, they remind us to be humble. Negative feelings tell us that we all have ups and downs and that it’s critical to remember and be present with what is. It’s also important to recognize with curiosity what might be a mental or emotional imbalance affecting our physical health. It’s so much easier for us to look for answers outside of ourselves. But I really want to encourage you to dig within and figure out what is triggering the flares and what lessons you can take away from them. And, as I frequently remind people, there is no such thing as a black and white cause-and-effect relationship because our bodies are far more complex than that.

It’s difficult for us to track down a single thing that could have caused our autoimmunity. So you’re looking in the wrong place if you’re seeking a miraculous medication, supplement, or diet. You’re addressing the issue in parts and pieces, which is a failing approach to our not-so-simple core cause of illness. I want you to remember that even when things aren’t going well, it will be okay soon. You need to trust the process.

Accepting What Is

We must cut ourselves some slack, surrender, and believe that our bodies are doing exactly what they need to do. Occasionally, I just say to myself, “Hey, Connie, you’re pushing too hard,” and this was precisely the lesson I needed to learn. You must trim back, pay attention to your body, and allow it to heal. Let’s just be in the now, taking deep breaths and loving what is. Be present at the moment with whatever imbalances you’re dealing with.

Then I’ll stay with that for long enough to fully experience the consequences of what’s going on inside me, mentally, emotionally, and physically. The only way through is the healing process. You can’t heal what you can’t feel if you refuse to experience what’s going on in your body.

In order to recover, you can’t repress and swallow what’s there; you have to bring it to the surface and identify what’s inside so that you can determine what to keep and what to discard. I wanted to write this blog to make sure you understand that sometimes it’s okay to taste the pain, as I recently did after receiving the COVID vaccination.

After getting the vaccine, I experienced a major flare. It was like the monster that triggered a cytokine storm within my body, causing enough stress to make it extremely difficult for me to feel like myself again. So I fought for a few months, and I finally realized that I needed to learn to sit with the discomfort.

I didn’t like it, but that didn’t mean I had to like it. Despite the fact that I didn’t like it, I just sat with it and accepted it, choosing to feel whatever I needed to feel in order to heal from those things physically, mentally, and emotionally. Only then was I able to elevate my spiritual health to have expanded consciousness and learn what I needed to.

Even now, I feel like it allows me to be a lot more genuine when I’m talking to you to figure out what you need. Because the answer is not always found in theoretical knowledge, even though that’s what we want to understand. We tend to try to get away from the “woo woo” intangible things.

You Can’t Heal What You Don’t Feel

As someone with an analytical mind, I constantly look for scientific data that is backed up by proof. What’s beneath the surface, the driving force that’s unseen and intangible (like our minds and emotions), has an impact on our physiology, yet it isn’t something that can be measured.

So the next time you don’t feel “good”, whatever it is, identify it and choose to feel it rather than deny or ignore it. At the end of the day, the worst thing that can happen to you is a sensation or a series of feelings.

Feelings aren’t a bad thing. It’s a chance for us to learn from them, progress from them, and grow from them. So keep in mind that everything that happens in our lives has a hidden lesson. So, with that, S.T.D (Surrender, Trust, Don’t Doubt) is definitely the way to go. In my Autoimmune Health Transformation Program, I teach it as a way of life.

So believe that your body is continually healing and don’t doubt its extraordinary healing abilities. If you do not believe your body can heal, that is the first thing you must work on.

Importance of Seeing the Big Picture

The subconscious mind can’t tell the difference between what’s real and what’s not real. So I always want to be doing positive affirmations and speak to myself consciously in a way that serves me. Telling yourself “I am healing” is such a more powerful way to think about it, to feed your mind enough positive vibration, to step into your power, to create that vibrational frequency, to aligned with our breath, and to have a mental, emotional, and physiological alignment that we need to ultimately heal from the inside out.

If you have been following me on Instagram, I’m sure you’ll find a lot of resonance with what I’m saying. Because no matter what you do, no matter what supplements or diet you follow, no matter how healthy you eat, if you don’t fix the “context” (inner programming) for the “content” you’re providing yourself with (diets, supplements, etc.), you’ll never have the full picture. So, think about how your mental and emotional health affects everyone around you – your physical health, your relationship with yourself, your loved ones, and your finances.

We all have stressors, which is a common human experience. That’s why I want you to see the big picture and realize that everything in your life matters. And everything that contributes to your stress levels also affects your health. It is a fact that stress plays a role in our autoimmunity.

Remember, I believe autoimmunity is an opportunity for positive development, not negative transformation. Yet most of us fall prey to this disempowered victim mindset without even recognizing it. Believe me, I was locked in that cycle for a long time, perpetuating my sickness. If this describes you, you should be aware that our Autoimmune Health Transformation Program is currently open.

Join Us

If you’re interested in the program, you can schedule a discovery call with me to determine if you’re a good fit for the program or whether this is the appropriate fit for you. So please, go ahead and check out the program. Schedule a discovery call if you’re truly interested.

I’d be so grateful if you could help me out and subscribe to my YouTube channel as well as our podcast which is available on Spotify, and iTunes. You can also visit and follow us on our Facebook page.

If you subscribe to my podcast, I would be extremely grateful if you could leave a review. It helps us spread the word of hope and empowerment to all individuals who are affected by autoimmunity so that we can finally put an end to all unnecessary pain.

The more we can heal together and create a community based on empowerment, the better. The more Self Empowered Healers there are, the better the world will be.

I’d appreciate hearing from you about what you’d like to learn from me, and what you’d like to see more of. Also, I’d like it if you followed me on Instagram and I’ve been on TikTok lately as well. I’ll talk to you all soon and I wish you a wonderful week.

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